Katy Perry has just launched a new line of fake eyelashes in a bid to remind the world that she’s not only a singer with a heart, but also a businesswoman with four houses. If you look at the pictures though, you’ll notice that everything is blue, which means she’s sad, because blue means sad. The most likely reason for her sadness is that her ex-husband Russell Brand is already shaking up with someone else. Therefore, we can now safely say Katy Perry is distraught at her ex-husband’s behaviour. See? This tabloid journalism thing isn’t so hard after all. Still, what do we know. Maybe launching a fake eyelash range is the best way to get over a relationship breakup. Maybe that’s where Kerry Katona’s been going wrong. Incidentally, The Sun’s description of them as ‘eyelid accessories’ is just brilliant.